Space, the final frontier! Also the one thing i am in most desperate need of. I am a 31 year old man who lives in a 12 by 12 by 8 and half foot box. This is something that will not due. Allow me to explain:
I Make no qualms about it, there is defiantly something pathetic about a thirty-one year old man living with his parents. No matter how i explain the reason for this to people it still doesn't add up to any respect. That fact of the matter is, it really is my own fault. I was the one who ran up the debt in an attempt to buy myself some happiness, so i have to take the medicine. The problem is the medicine sucks and it works very slowly. So now that i have admitted my failures, the question comes: Why do my parents insist on making things as unpleasant for me as possible?
When i first Moved back into my parents house i was relegated to the basement. Not a nice finished basement, but a very dark poorly ventilated cellar. It was dark and dingy but at least there was room. There was also an infestation of yellow jackets, that i learned of when i was stung on the neck in my sleep. I was understanding of this at first. There was no room at my house, and if i was going to come crawling home i really didn't think i deserved much better. But after my sister was married and moved out with my nephew there were now two rooms available. A large bedroom with two windows a celling fan, and plenty of SPACE, or the glorified closet i am in now. Well my parents who do nothing on the computer except crashing it, felt the deserved a computer room slash guest room. We never have guest either. So now i have a room i can't keep clean because i have a closet filled with boxes and all the furniture is way to big, but it was all second hand so it wasn't even meant for that room. The snake and fish tank was my own choice so i won't bitch about that, but i can't walk in my room to get over to the tank to feed them.
But if you have endured reading this i will explain why i bring it up: Along with the other things i am working for in my own personal restoration is space, my own space. I want a place where i can choose the paint for the walls. This will probably be one of the harder task to accomplish but it is also one of the most important. I have accomplished nothing toward this end but i will begin to reduce my personal property so that moving will be much easier, and i can maybe earn a little extra money. When i am ready to sell i will let you all know.
The List:
1. Get my eyes fixed. completed
2. Lose Weight. in process
3. Earn a degree. returning to school this fall
4. Learn a Language. still haven't picked a language
5. Learn how to play an instrument. I picked the guitar, now i just need to get myself a new Acoustic guitar or a new amp for my electric
6. Find a space of my own. Haven't started yet
7. Read great works of western culture. Finished most of Shakespeare's plays and Moliere, and also the ancient Greek stuff, still a long way to go.
8. Fix my insomnia. it comes and goes, two good weeks one bad week, no permanent solution yet discovered
9. Find a woman who loves me as much as i love her. lol! i have made no headway and i have no idea how to accomplish this, but it has to be on the list.
10. Make a living working in the theatre. Completing 5 or 6 of theses will help to make this much easier, but i will have to complete a graduate degree to guarantee it. This will take time. lol! Which i have plenty of.
Monday, July 28, 2008
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Chapter 3: "This Guy is Fucked in the Head!"
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Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Chapter Two: Reconstruction!
Take a moment right now to think about what you want. Don't analyze it just ponder it. At this moment in time what is the most important thing you wish to acquire? Whether it be a physical object or a metaphysical idea, it is important to understand that what you desire most won't come to you unless you start off toward it. Allow me to explain, if i can:
My name is Timothy Gillespie (i assume most of you already knew that), and up until 12 weeks ago i was a 341 pound, balding, broke, lazy, miserable, community college drop out with a terribly average job working for an extraordinarily bad company, and with no future other then living with my parents until i got some white trash cow i met on the Internet pregnant and moved into my very own double wide. Being of average intelligence, i was cursed with knowing how my life was going and where i was going to end up. But as the old saying goes " It is darkest before the Dawn", it wasn't until i hit rock bottom that i was even able to see how far i had fallen. Once i was able to step back and see what a mess i had made of my life. I knew things had to change if i was ever going to be truly happy and not just numbing myself with food and alchool.
So i began work on what will be a very challenging task: I am going to rebuild Timothy Gillespie! Mind and body, i think my soul is OK so i will leave that be for now.
This is what this Blog will be about for the most part, sharing my journey, the good days and the bad. In between i will share my crazy thoughts on the world. You will be able to see the universe through my eyes so be careful! LOL!
Step 1: in reconstruction - Lose the weight!
Started 12 weeks ago and am down 48 pounds.
Stay tuned to see what happens next!
My name is Timothy Gillespie (i assume most of you already knew that), and up until 12 weeks ago i was a 341 pound, balding, broke, lazy, miserable, community college drop out with a terribly average job working for an extraordinarily bad company, and with no future other then living with my parents until i got some white trash cow i met on the Internet pregnant and moved into my very own double wide. Being of average intelligence, i was cursed with knowing how my life was going and where i was going to end up. But as the old saying goes " It is darkest before the Dawn", it wasn't until i hit rock bottom that i was even able to see how far i had fallen. Once i was able to step back and see what a mess i had made of my life. I knew things had to change if i was ever going to be truly happy and not just numbing myself with food and alchool.
So i began work on what will be a very challenging task: I am going to rebuild Timothy Gillespie! Mind and body, i think my soul is OK so i will leave that be for now.
This is what this Blog will be about for the most part, sharing my journey, the good days and the bad. In between i will share my crazy thoughts on the world. You will be able to see the universe through my eyes so be careful! LOL!
Step 1: in reconstruction - Lose the weight!
Started 12 weeks ago and am down 48 pounds.
Stay tuned to see what happens next!
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Chapter One: Things you Don't Know About Timothy!
Hello and welcome to what i hope will be a very active "BLOG" but knowing me as i do, it will probably last a week. But what a great week it is going to be! First let's learn about our Blogger:
1. I hate crowds. I always feel very uncomfortable when i am surrounded by more then ten people.
2. I was born on a Monday. You're right who cares!
3. I don't like when foods mix together, also i eat each item on my plate entirely before moving onto the next item. This has annoyed my parents all my life and led to some very unpleasant dinners. I also used to separate my M&M's, Skittles, and Lucky Charms.
4. Not a big fan of large breast. I have always followed the saying: "More than a handful is a waste." And being that i have small Irish hands, well you see where i am going.
5. I was an Honorary Girl Scout. There is nothing more that needs to be said.
6. I fucking hate being called: Timmy or Timbo. Timbo won't get you killed but god do you sound stupid when you say it.
7. I lost my Virginity at a party, on the floor of the room with the coats on the bed. I was too nice just to push all those peoples coats on the floor. In retrospect i think i made the right choice.
8. My mother is a sweet women, but a terrible cook. But if i am allowed one meal before i die, it would be her chicken cutlets with yellow rice and string beans. As long as they don't get mixed together, and i would eat them in this order: rice, chicken, and than string beans. Same way every time.
9. I used to be a Republican, than i grew a heart and became a liberal/Democrat, than i grew a brain and became an independent. Republicans = Evil and Democrats = Stupid. Hate me all you want you know its true.
10. I am still in love with the first girl i kissed, and i still love the first car i owned. I am sure one day i will get over her but never my car.
11. My ten favorite musical artest : 1. The beatles 2. Pink Floyd 3. The Who 4. Elvis 5. Jonny Cash 6. Queen 7. The Rolling Stones 8. Simon & Garfunkel 9. Bob Dylan 10. Anything with Eric Clapton.
12. Sorry but Led Zepplin are overated. Sorry it's just the way i feel.
13. Rod Stewart is underated.
14. I loved the first couple season's of the REal World, now all reality TV makes me sick!
15. I perform random acts of kindness all the time, but i never talk about them, and am not going to start now.
16. I voted for George Bush in 2000, and John Kerry in 2004, both were huge mistakes.
17. I hate flying! It has nothing to do with fear, it all has to do with small fucking seats!
18. I have no game! There was a time when i had a little game but now i have none.
19. My favorite color is red! When i was five an asked what my favorite color was by my teacher, i said "red, the color of blood." That got a note sent home.
20. In kindergarten i was labeled as dangerous for stiking up for myself when i was getting picked on by a third grader. That remained in my file until high school.
21. Women scare me, i am a logical thinker, anything i can understand and predict terrifies me.
22. I love comics, anime, Sci-fi, Fantacy, Harry Potter, Theatre, and acting all together, but i hate wearing costumes.
23. I love clowns! Even when they aren't funny, especialy when they aren't funny!
24. Belive it or not but the Frank Miller Classic "The Dark Knight Returns" kept me sane in Junior high and High School. Is that weird? I hope so!
25. I hate talking on telephones, but if you call i will suffer through it.
1. I hate crowds. I always feel very uncomfortable when i am surrounded by more then ten people.
2. I was born on a Monday. You're right who cares!
3. I don't like when foods mix together, also i eat each item on my plate entirely before moving onto the next item. This has annoyed my parents all my life and led to some very unpleasant dinners. I also used to separate my M&M's, Skittles, and Lucky Charms.
4. Not a big fan of large breast. I have always followed the saying: "More than a handful is a waste." And being that i have small Irish hands, well you see where i am going.
5. I was an Honorary Girl Scout. There is nothing more that needs to be said.
6. I fucking hate being called: Timmy or Timbo. Timbo won't get you killed but god do you sound stupid when you say it.
7. I lost my Virginity at a party, on the floor of the room with the coats on the bed. I was too nice just to push all those peoples coats on the floor. In retrospect i think i made the right choice.
8. My mother is a sweet women, but a terrible cook. But if i am allowed one meal before i die, it would be her chicken cutlets with yellow rice and string beans. As long as they don't get mixed together, and i would eat them in this order: rice, chicken, and than string beans. Same way every time.
9. I used to be a Republican, than i grew a heart and became a liberal/Democrat, than i grew a brain and became an independent. Republicans = Evil and Democrats = Stupid. Hate me all you want you know its true.
10. I am still in love with the first girl i kissed, and i still love the first car i owned. I am sure one day i will get over her but never my car.
11. My ten favorite musical artest : 1. The beatles 2. Pink Floyd 3. The Who 4. Elvis 5. Jonny Cash 6. Queen 7. The Rolling Stones 8. Simon & Garfunkel 9. Bob Dylan 10. Anything with Eric Clapton.
12. Sorry but Led Zepplin are overated. Sorry it's just the way i feel.
13. Rod Stewart is underated.
14. I loved the first couple season's of the REal World, now all reality TV makes me sick!
15. I perform random acts of kindness all the time, but i never talk about them, and am not going to start now.
16. I voted for George Bush in 2000, and John Kerry in 2004, both were huge mistakes.
17. I hate flying! It has nothing to do with fear, it all has to do with small fucking seats!
18. I have no game! There was a time when i had a little game but now i have none.
19. My favorite color is red! When i was five an asked what my favorite color was by my teacher, i said "red, the color of blood." That got a note sent home.
20. In kindergarten i was labeled as dangerous for stiking up for myself when i was getting picked on by a third grader. That remained in my file until high school.
21. Women scare me, i am a logical thinker, anything i can understand and predict terrifies me.
22. I love comics, anime, Sci-fi, Fantacy, Harry Potter, Theatre, and acting all together, but i hate wearing costumes.
23. I love clowns! Even when they aren't funny, especialy when they aren't funny!
24. Belive it or not but the Frank Miller Classic "The Dark Knight Returns" kept me sane in Junior high and High School. Is that weird? I hope so!
25. I hate talking on telephones, but if you call i will suffer through it.
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